“The easy way out is often just that—the ‘easy’ way out of the most rewarding lifestyle.”
- Albert Ellis
There are some things we don’t want to confront—about life and about ourselves.
The harshness of reality is one of them. Have you just been through a toxic relationship? Are you a chronic underachiever? Are you not getting the breaks you think you deserve?
If you had the chance to go through life without any difficulties, you would. And that’s normal! Who wants to live a life of trials and tribulations?
Unfortunately, life doesn’t work that way. The reality is that life is full of heartbreaks. And loving others can be painful.
But the truth about life and love is that in order for them to have meaning and ultimately be fulfilling, our best moments have to be tempered with the worst.
The more you try to block out and resist life’s and love’s harshest elements, the more you’ll end up living in delusion. Instead of lying to yourself, focus on being the best person you can be.
As gold is tested in fire, so must you draw the best version of yourself out of the chaos of living.
Here are 10 harsh truths that will make you a better person:
We are mortal beings. We’re not meant to live forever, and there’s no running away from that fact. The fountain of youth is nothing but a myth.
Accept your own mortality. Yes, we all should live healthy lives, but waste your time trying to find the secret sauce for a longer life. We only get one life, and we can’t predict when and how it will end.
Life’s fragility should make us realize how valuable it is. Instead of fearing it, we should embrace it. Make the best of your time in this world while you still can.
The truth about life is that we can’t control everything in and around it. We can’t do anything about those things because they’re out of our hands.
So loosen your grip and stop feeling like you should be on top of everything. If you try to control everything around you, you’ll end up being miserable. Let nature take its course and you’ll be happier for it.
If, for example, you’ve been controlling yourself from catching feelings for a friend because you don’t want to ruin your friendship, then we recommend letting those feelings out instead of repressing them; you can’t control who you fall for anyway.
This is one truth about life some people can’t seem to accept. You can’t master everything. No matter how much you try, there are things you simply aren’t good at.
It hurts even more to know that you aren’t good at something you like.
Some opportunities aren’t for you, and that’s okay. All your misses give you a reason to improve on the things you’re already great at. Doesn’t that feel liberating? There’s a reason many believe that the truth sets people free!
Let’s be honest: many of us are afraid to be alone. But there will be times in our life when we, even for a moment, will be alone. It’s one of the sad truths some can’t bear to live with.
And because of that, some people willingly put up with a toxic relationship with intolerable partners. They’re scared to be by themselves. Some cannot live without company; others hang to the notion of “saving” their lovers.
We’re here to tell you that love shouldn’t feel that way. Don’t waste your time with partners who bring nothing but misery. Be with somebody who contributes to your overall happiness.
One harsh truth about life we should realize is that we can’t please everyone. People-pleasers have difficulty accepting this because of their need to appease others.
If you keep accommodating other people and putting yourself second to their desires, you’ll eventually lose yourself. No one should sacrifice their overall happiness to please other people. Many people won’t understand or like you, and that’s fine. Even the most popular and beloved people have their detractors.
Take comfort in who you are. Accepting yourself is just as important as being accepted by others. Asserting your boundaries may be uncomfortable, but it’s necessary if you want to earn respect.
Don’t focus on things that give you temporary happiness. What may boost your ego now won’t make you happy in the long run.
You can apply this logic to love and relationships too. Let’s say you’ve been on a casual, no-strings-attached arrangement with someone for a while now. It may satisfy you now, but it won’t bring long-term fulfillment.
The point: pursue things and people that provide more than instant gratification. Happiness shouldn’t be a fleeting feeling.
One of the harder truths to accept is that the internet does not accurately represent real life.
Many people like documenting their moves on social media for various reasons; some want to show off, while others simply want to share and preserve their memories. We understand some of us can get envious of what we see online.
Pretty pictures are undeniably captivating, yes? However, they’re not all what they’re hyped up to be. Who knows, the people you see on social media may not be truly as happy as their posts suggest.
Failure is an inevitable experience. It’s either your best wasn’t enough, or you haven’t been lucky.
Failure isn’t great, but don’t let this sad truth about life discourage you from pursuing your interests. Accept the outcomes and take your experiences as lessons for your future endeavors.
You can apply this mindset to relationships too; don’t let your heartbreaks make you close the door to your heart permanently.
Some people are just a waste of our time and energy. You don’t need the toxicity, so walking away from them is the best option. You don’t want to be around someone who won’t bring anything good.
If you want to get ahead in life and grow as a person, you sometimes need to get away from certain toxic and negative people. It’s harsh, but you’ll ultimately be better for it.
The truth about this world is that no person’s truly altruistic. Everyone has selfish tendencies, including yourself. No one likes admitting this, but it’s true. And that’s a human feeling.
Don’t be too disappointed in the truth about life and love. You’ll appreciate their difficult elements later when you find yourself in challenging circumstances.