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Am I Marrying the Right Person?

Husband and wife holding hands in marriage ceremony
One of the most important questions to ask yourself when considering marriage is, “Am I marrying the right person?”

To tie the knot or not? This may be in your thoughts as you look at your partner and images of a blissful life together begin playing in your mind. But is it finally time to take the relationship to the next level?

Choosing the person you are going to spend the rest of your life with may be one of the biggest decisions you would ever make. It is no wonder that many are anxious about the question, “Am I marrying the right person?”

If you are wondering how to choose your partner wisely, remember there is no yardstick or full-proof checklist that will tell you point-blank that this person is the one for you. Often, it is a mix of objective and subjective factors that finally gives you that gut feeling that you’ve finally found the one. So how can we choose well?

Dating is a good place to prepare for such a decision. You select your partner not just to get to know them for a time but to eventually build up a lifetime commitment with them. It is important to start assessing the viability of your partner as a life-long companion as you go further in your relationship before considering popping the question.

Certain milestones together, recurring incidents, or remarkable characteristics in your partner may already give you the go signal to take the plunge or on the contrary, to step back and discontinue the relationship. Since choosing your partner is also choosing your future, it’s good to know what are the green flags versus the red ones before selecting the right person.

Good Qualities in a Woman to Marry

There are many desirable characteristics in a woman but there are some qualities that will help you tell more clearly if she is fitting to be a wife. She needs to be someone not just with a pleasing personality but with a solid character to go with it. If you often ask yourself, “Am I marrying the right person?” this list of qualities of a marriageable woman will help you find the right answer.

A beautiful woman smiling
Look for the good qualities in a woman to marry before choosing your partner in life.

1. Kind and Compassionate

A woman may be undeniably beautiful on the outside, but her true lasting charm is her heart. Her kindness shows in her words and actions, seeking to be of help whenever the situation calls her to. She is kind and compassionate not just towards you but to others as well, making those around her feel loved and safe. Her gentle presence is a rest you can always look forward to and rely on, especially on tough days.

2. Loving and Affectionate

When a woman is loving and affectionate, she is irresistible to love in return. Her sweetness and affection inspire a man to be gentle and loving as well, bringing out the best in a relationship. Knowing how to treat each other well is essential in a life-long partnership and must spring from a mutual affection sustained by concrete efforts to love and be there for each other.

3. Caring and Nurturing

It is part of the feminine genius to be caring and nurturing. A woman naturally brings life not just physically but emotionally and morally, wherever she shares her gifts and presence. It is one of the good qualities in a woman to marry, especially since you will be bearing and raising children with her. Someone generous in giving herself for the good of others will not only make a good wife but also a wonderful mother. Her care and concern will make your home truly a place of warmth and welcome.

4. Trustworthy and Faithful

Trust is a non-negotiable in a profound commitment such as marriage. This is naturally tried and tested through varied experiences that a couple goes through over time. When you find a woman who you can trust with your strengths and weaknesses without fear or shame, then you have one for keeps. There will always be rough roads and stormy seas in a marriage but her faithfulness will be like an anchor that will keep you grounded in who you are and keep the relationship firm.

5. Supportive and Understanding

As a wife, a woman is your partner in life and for life. It is then essential that you find her to be a faithful support that you can always count on in good times and in bad. When faced with challenges in life, having someone to lean on will remind you why did you choose your partner in the first place. Her understanding and patience will sustain you and your marriage as you overcome these difficulties.

Signs You Married the Right Person

When you have found the right woman for you, don’t wait long to put a ring on her finger. These are some signs that tell you choosing to marry her is the best decision of your life.

A man embracing his partner
When you choose your partner wisely, you will never regret marrying her.

1. You are Comfortable with Her

Being with someone every day for the rest of your life is a big deal. Might as well spend it with someone you know you’re comfortable with. If not, it would be terrible to endure boredom or annoyance on a daily basis. If you can listen to her and talk with her for hours, enjoy her company, and be your best and worst self with her, then most likely you have the right person to share life with.

2. You are Looking Forward to a Future with Her

One of the signs that you married the right person is that you are giddy about the future and filled with plans and dreams together. Marriage is a constant building up towards things that are yet to come whether it’s a new house, children, or typical family events. If you are not looking forward to a future with her, then maybe it’s a sign to question your present relationship.

3. She Shares your Values and Goals

Since you do life together, having common interests and values will make your days more meaningful and fulfilling. They may say opposites attract but what matters in the long run is what keeps you together. Sharing the same purpose and beliefs helps make your bond stronger and closer.

4. She Makes Life Better

The best part of marriage is that your life is better because it is shared with someone. If you see yourself becoming a worse person or getting hindered in reaching your goals because of your partner, then she is not the one for you. Your wife is your best friend and the only reason to marry her is because she brings out the best in life and the best in you. If not, then there’s no reason to get married to her at all.

Consequences of Marrying the Wrong Person

Because marriage is a major commitment, it has a great impact on our life, both when we decide it well and when we don’t. No one can be the perfect spouse but it’s best to avoid a mismatch. These consequences of marrying the wrong person may have permanent and substantial effects on you, your family, and your children.

A couple in conflict
One of the consequences of marrying the wrong person is unhappiness in life.

1. Conflicts

Conflicts abound in difficult marriages and they may end up causing deep wounds and trauma. Because your partner is someone who has great significance in your life, the wounds caused by a conflict with her may be extremely deep and painful. Recovery and resolution could take much time and effort.

2. Unhappiness

Getting your heart broken because of a relationship with the wrong person is hard to go through. It can make you depressed and affect your mental health. It is tough to accept getting your dreams crushed by someone you thought would bring you happiness but there will always be hope if we let go and try again.

3. Damaged Health

Studies show that a marriage replete with fights and disagreements can have negative health implications for the couple. Conflicts in a relationship can damage one’s natural body responses such as the release of stress hormones, appetite regulation, and inflammation which can then affect one’s heart and immune system.

4. Financial Difficulties

If marrying the wrong person leads you to get a divorce, you may suffer financial woes. Getting a divorce could be expensive and would leave you not just with a broken heart but also a broken bank account. Marriage is a good place to sustain wealth but when it goes wrong, it can also be the worst way to lose it.

The decision of tying the knot has ripple effects in all aspects of one’s life. “Am I marrying the right person?” is a question that is wise to weigh prudently and patiently. Reflect if your partner truly has the good qualities of a woman to marry and ask yourself why you would choose her.

The importance of marrying the right person cannot be overlooked but at the same time, remember not to look for Ms. Perfect. Your future spouse will inevitably make mistakes, fight with you, or even hurt you, and maybe vice versa. But if both of you are willing to forgive and work it out then all the challenges will be worth it. Do not despair because the right woman is out there for you; you just have to choose well.

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