How to Embrace Cultural Differences When Dating Filipinas

Many things stand out about the Philippines, including its picturesque scenery, the local cuisine, and local hospitality, making it an underrated bucket-list country for travelers worldwide.

But how about its culture? Many old-school thinkers will argue that the Philippines has lost much of its roots, claiming that centuries of Spanish, American, and Japanese occupation have ruined its national identity and fragmented its culture.

But those who think half-glass-full say that the culture, regardless of its formation, is uniquely beautiful and inseparable from its people.

If you have been eyeing an attractive Filipino woman for a while now and want to get to know her, then be ready to dive into Filipino culture. This will help you brace yourself for the cultural differences between you.

Understanding Filipino Culture

Filipino culture is a melting pot of Eastern and Western influences. This fact makes it one of the world’s most interesting cultures.

Three centuries of Spanish rule, 48 years of American occupation, and interaction between Chinese traders before the Spanish conquest have undoubtedly shaped the Philippines. You can see all these in the architecture, food, and social norms.

The country’s predominant religion and archipelagic geography have also helped mold local identity.

According to the Philippines’ 2020 Census of Population and Housing, 78.8% of the country’s household population follows Roman Catholicism. One example of the influence of this religion is the Filipino practice of fiestas (festivals).

Each province holds several annual celebrations in honor of its patron saints, and each has its own unique traditions.

For example, the Higaonon tribe in Northern Mindanao practices panlaoy, a sacred forest management custom. Meanwhile, the Cebuanos celebrate the Sinulog Festival in honor of the Santo Niño or the Child Jesus by featuring colorful costumes and street parades.

The reason for such instances of cultural differences in the Philippines is its archipelago structure, where each area is interconnected but operates independently.

Filipino Dating Traditions

While many Filipino daters (especially Gen Zers and millennials) have adapted to modern times, others prefer to stick to old-school practices. And with that, it’s safe to say that cultural differences between generations exist, especially in dating.

Before technology’s emergence, Filipinos practiced panliligaw (courtship).

Men had to make the first move and ask permission from women’s parents. They had to woo their dream girls in their homes with the women’s family members around. Some even went the extra mile and sang a romantic song accompanied by the sounds of their guitar.

If the men didn’t earn parental blessings, they were prohibited from dating their romantic interest.

As technology and the Internet arose, Filipinos slowly swapped traditional dating practices in favor of modern ones. It’s not unusual to see an adult swiping away at their phones for potential matches. A 2021 study shared that 42% of the surveyed Filipino participants admitted to using dating apps in 2020.

The Role of the Family

Placing the family first is one of the most notable Filipino cultural tendencies. The nuclear family may be the central unit, but extended family members receive similar care and attention.

Most Filipinos view their families as safety nets. When times and finances get tough, they run to their parents and relatives for support and solace. Filipino kids tend to stay with their parents even as they become adults. They’ll only leave their parents’ homes when they get married.

Filipino families tend to get involved in their children’s personal lives, especially relationships. Some may see this as invasive, but most of these families come from a place of concern and love.

Apart from their children’s futures, they want to ensure their genuine happiness.

Don’t be surprised if your Filipina match wants you to meet her family. Aside from gaining their approval, she wants you to know the most important people in her life. Isn’t that something worth rejoicing about? We think so.

Whether on a business or personal trip to the Philippines, you may want to research the country’s culture. This way, you won’t risk offending locals during your visit. Some thoughtfulness and sensitivity will go a long way in interacting with Filipinos, especially women.

Cultural Differences between the Philippines and America

The difference between American and Filipino cultures makes them seem like they’re two poles that are miles apart from each other.

For instance, many Filipinos follow a collectivist mindset; they often consider other people when making decisions. On the other hand, Americans highly value individualism. Once one reaches adulthood, they expect to gain independence from their families.

Another significant difference between Filipino and American cultures is their attitudes toward power distance. Americans tend to call their coworkers by their first names. Moreover, they are vocal in expressing their opinions to their superiors.

Meanwhile, Filipinos make it a point to address senior work colleagues with appropriate honorifics. While they do assert their rights, they won’t speak up unless they find it necessary. Some view this passiveness as a negative trait because it makes them seem like pushovers.

Beauty Standards in Different Cultures

Beauty is a subjective matter. People have biases shaped by their cultures and environments.

In the Philippines, there’s a common notion that light- or pale-skinned people are more attractive. Numerous beauty advertisements make fairer skin their main selling point.

On the other hand, many Americans view dusky and dark skin tones positively. Many use various methods like bronzers and tanning sprays to achieve such appearances.

And with that said, the lesson here is this: beauty in different cultures isn’t a one-size-fits-all matter. Instead of favoring one standard over another, people should appreciate them for what they are.

So if, for example, you’re dating a Filipina, embrace her sun-kissed glow instead of trying to make her change it. She’ll appreciate you for that.

Common Ground Between Cultures

Despite the cultural differences of Philippines and America, there is common ground.

For example, despite cultural differences in art, Filipinos and Americans have slightly similar tastes in music, movies, and fashion because of the latter's influence.

Both are also open to interacting with and learning from people of different cultures. For instance, when foreigners arrive in the Philippines, locals try their best to accommodate them. Meanwhile, the latter learns to adjust to their new environment.

There may be diversity challenges, such as stereotypes, misinterpretations, and personal biases. However, that doesn’t stop both Americans and Filipinos from embracing different people.

How to Handle Cultural Differences with Your Filipino Partner

Some elements of Filipino culture have evolved with the times, while others remain firmly traditional. This may create some tension between you and your Filipino partner.

However, these tips will show you how to handle cultural differences with your partner and maintain a harmonic union:

1. Recognize your differences.

You can’t fix problems if you don’t acknowledge them. Talking about them helps because it means you’re aware of their existence.

For instance, cultural differences in communication exist, with the Western world practicing low-context communication and the Philippines swearing by high-context communication. You and your Filipina match can discuss how you normally communicate and work from there.

2. Talk about and pursue activities with similar interests.

What do you and your Filipino partner have in common? Focus on that and do activities based on your mutual passions. This helps build a stronger bond.

3. Learn about each other’s cultures.

Do you want to get to know each other better? Research questions to ask someone of a different culture. Here are some worth asking:

1. What’s your favorite dish from your culture?

   Does this sound simple? Yes. However, a question like this can open the door for fun conversations. Food is a personal experience, and a favorite dish contains anecdotes that reveal more about a person.

2. What’s a typical day like in your country?

   Daily routines may seem boring, but you may be surprised by that of other cultures. Gaining a preview of a different country expands your worldview, which can contribute to your growth as a partner and person.

3. What are your culture’s deal-breakers?

   Since there are clear cultural differences between the Philippines and other countries, don’t risk offending your Filipina match with assumptions. Ask her about her culture’s deal-breakers and avoid committing anything hurtful. She’d appreciate that initiative.

Questions help in getting to know someone from a different background. But remember, their content is one thing, and the manner of asking them is another.

Should you ask one of the questions above, don’t forget to practice tact and mindfulness. Read the room before opening your mouth.

4. Make adjustments.

Cultural adjustments don’t stop at listening. Actions also hold a lot of weight. You may need to forgo some of your preferences to meet your relationship’s needs. However, know that compromise is necessary for harmony.

5. Exercise patience.

Changes don’t happen overnight because people have difficulty letting go of familiar things. Be patient and let your partner adjust to your compromises at their own pace.

You can’t run away from cultural differences when dating a Filipino woman because they’re inevitable. Instead of evading them, why not learn to overcome them? Your relationship will be much better if you embrace them.