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Do Men Like Independent Women?

An independent woman at the workplace
Do men like independent women? Contrary to popular belief, they do.

Do men like independent women? We would think the answer is obviously no, but the reality might surprise you.

According to a study on the singles population, more than 87% of guys confessed they were interested in dating women who were more intellectual, educated, and higher-paid than they were. (Birch 2018).

Women are now receiving more appreciation than we gave them credit for. In turn, men are learning to let them flourish in their own way. When they do, men find them more attractive.

But why do men like strong, independent women? Aren’t they intimidated? Don’t men desire to have the upper hand in a relationship?

Why Men Like Independent Women

What sets an independent woman apart from others?

An independent woman stands by her autonomy in her decisions and direction in life. She is not afraid to trust in herself and explore varied possibilities. She is determined and adventurous when it comes to her passions and interests.

Such a woman knows her worth, strengths, and weaknesses. People may constantly compliment her for her beauty, intelligence, and success, but she doesn’t rely on others to know her value because she knows her worth.

In a relationship, this kind of woman knows who she is and is confident in being herself. She doesn’t aim to please anyone, not even her partner.

Advantages of Dating Independent Women

Why do men like women who are independent? Aside from their nature, dating them comes with advantages.

Less Confusion

One of the advantages of dating an independent woman is that she is self-assured and confident. She knows herself and what she wants. Such an attitude prevents confusion and misunderstandings in the relationship.

Open Communication

An independent woman is aware of her characteristics, needs, and limitations, so she communicates them.

Communication is one of the most important aspects of a relationship. A study goes as far as to say it's the "heart" of promoting relationship satisfaction. This only means that, on the contrary, a lack of it can lead to misunderstandings, arguments, and eventually, the dissolution of a relationship.

A common manifestation of a lack of communication in relationships is when one pushes their partner to read their mind, assuming they should know what they want or need if they love them. But there's no such thing when you’re in a relationship with an independent woman.

Driven and Passionate

Independent women are driven and passionate. They have a purpose and give themselves wholly to it, whether at work, in relationships, or society. They love doing what they do and become an inspiration for others, especially for the man in their life.

As men tend to be self-driven and ambitious, living alongside someone who encourages them to be better proves to be a great asset.

An independent woman doing her work
If you’re wondering why men like independent women, realize that they have a lot of admirable qualities that make them attractive.

Disadvantages of Dating Independent Women

Realize that all relationships aren’t a walk in the park. You’ll have your fair share of challenges, which demand effort, time, and occasional sacrifices.

Strong-Willed

Independent women are strong-willed, which can be both good and bad. A strong character is an advantage, but independent women may face difficulties when situations require them to adapt or compromise.

Of course, they would like to work things out with their partner, but it often takes them more effort. You would need to have patience and persistence in instances like this. It may take a lot of trial and error, but it would be worth it.

Too Self-Dependent

Why do men like strong, independent women? They’re reliable and responsible. However, too much self-dependence can make them less appreciative of their partners.

A relationship is a give-and-take dynamic between two people who care about each other as they aim to enrich each other’s lives. It can be tough to do that with a partner who refuses to hear another perspective and receive help.

Not all independent women are like this, but it’s good to know they may tend to be so. Fortunately, you can overcome this difficulty through communication and vulnerability. Offering support and taking initiative while respecting her freedom can help ensure a two-way street for the relationship.

Too Much Distance

Often, self-assured women like men who are independent as well. However, if they’re both self-sufficient, they might suffer from too much distance in the relationship. Having space and being your own person is crucial in a relationship. But if both sides take an unhealthy dose of distance, it can pull them apart in the long run.

Intimacy and commitment sustain a relationship. As you’re both highly independent individuals, sustain intimacy through quality time, mutual reliance, and openness to each other’s gifts and limitations.

Tips for Dating Independent Women

Are you one of those men who like independent women? Take note of these tips to date such an incredible kind of woman.

A man and woman talking by the pool
Do men like strong, independent women? Yes. They may seem intimidating, but being in a relationship with them gives deep fulfillment.

Respect

Primarily, an independent woman needs respect from a man. According to an article published in The Family Journal, show this by acknowledging your differences, taking responsibility, being willing to reflect on the relationship, and being open to letting go of emotions and conflicts.

When you honor her in these ways, you affirm her value and support her growth.

Genuine Care

Though they tend to be self-sufficient, independent women need a caring partner. Let her know that you care and appreciate her through simple things, like asking about her day, giving compliments, or occasional surprises. These can strengthen your relationship and reassure her of your presence and reliability.

Equality

Don’t let one side dominate, but always try to see each other as equals—someone who is a help rather than a hindrance to each other’s goals. Keep each other updated, make big decisions together, share each other’s interests and hobbies, and communicate actively to maintain the stability and richness of the relationship.

She Brings Out the Best in Her Man.

Do women like independent men? The answer is obvious. On the other hand, the answer to the question, “Do men like independent women?” can be a mystery. However, it turns out that the answer is yes.

Dating an independent woman may sound intimidating, but being with someone strong, smart, and secure can bring out the best in a man. Ultimately, this relationship makes the long haul worth it because of the deep satisfaction and fulfillment it brings.

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References

Birch, Jenna. 2018. “Do Men Actually Not Want to Date Intelligent Women?” Psychology Today.

https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/navigating-the-love-gap/201802/do-men-actually-not-want-date-intelligent-women .

De Netto, Priscilla Maria, Kia Quek, and Karen Golden. 2021. “Communication, the Heart of a Relationship: Examining Capitalization, Accommodation, and Self-Construal on Relationship Satisfaction.” Frontiers in Psychology 12, no. 767908 (December). 10.3389/fpsyg.2021.767908

Eckstein, Sarah, Donna Eckstein, and Aretha Franklin. 2013. “Creating Respect in Couples: The Couple's Respect Questionnaire (CRQ).” The Family Journal: Counseling and Therapy for Couples and Families 22, no. 1 (November): 98-104. 10.1177/1066480713505062.

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